How to Love Yourself a Little More Fully Today
- elisapaklmft
- Oct 12, 2021
- 2 min read
By Elisa Pak, LMFT
Originally published October 11, 2019
Living in a society where we are taught to accentuate our strengths and hide our flaws, we are all too accustomed to showing appreciation and love for the things we like about ourselves and wishing we could change everything else. How often have you repeated the things you like about yourself in order to build self-esteem and yet continue to criticize and reject the rest of you? Today, I invite you to do something radical: love your flaws.
Give your imperfections some love today- something that I’m sure many of us rarely, if ever, have done. Instead of harshly criticizing or rejecting them as we normally do, we are going to love them. So think of all the parts of yourself that you’ve been living your life rejecting and send them your love and acceptance. For example, if you’ve never really liked your nose, today you can say “I love my nose. Sure it’s (insert descriptive words) but it is MY nose. It is a part of me and I love me.” If it’s your stomach, you can say “I love my stomach. Sure, it’s (insert fitting adjectives), but it is MY stomach. I love it and it is a part of me.” Repeat these loving statements with all other parts of yourself that you've previously never loved or felt insecure about.
They can be non-physical traits as well. Such as “I love that I get nervous when I’m at parties. Sure, I feel awkward and uncomfortable at times, but that’s ok and it’s actually kind of cute. I'm sure other people feel nervous too. I love that I am human and have imperfections and that they are a part of who I am. I love and accept all of me.”
As you perform this loving exercise, notice how you feel towards these parts of yourself that have never been given this sort of love and acceptance. It may feel forced at first or it may feel healing and integrating. It is this constant rejection of parts of ourselves that prevent us from fully loving ourselves and experiencing true love and acceptance, which is unconditional and unwavering. You may find it counterproductive to love the things about yourself that you have been trying to improve or change. However, you can love and accept who you are in this present moment and love and accept the person you become tomorrow as well. So today, love yourself a little more fully and love all of you, especially your so-called flaws. You are unique, a work of art, and all of you deserves all of your love. Every day.